Hmm... I need to find out myself. I don't know what is the answer. I'll do some poking around and get back to you if I bump into an anything. You should email the people at Medifast as they probably could assist you..
Here Here! NOBODY SHOULD BE LECTURED ON THIS BOARD!..
I know what you mean.
But I will still ask the questions.
I'm paying too much money for this program to fear internet tough guys.
Bless you for this post Ashley... you made my day..
Concur! (I think of them as "the board bullies.")..
Well said, it was out order!!! Cheating is cheating and everyone has to handle it accordingly. Some can be 100% OP and some can't. It is what it is.....
Anyway, I hope you all have an AWESOME WEEK!!!..
Totally agree with you! I usually dont go on the boards for this very reason. Maybe some people need to get out more...hahaha..
I have to admit that I see a certain irony to this thread. Is it not a little rude to create a thread solely to put down and dismiss the opinions of people with different outlooks? Most of us here really just want to help and while we might get stuck in "this way" versus "that way," I think most people really have good intentions in sharing their stories and advice...
To the OP - a hearty AMEN! couldn't agree with you more.....
I agree 100% (oooo...bad wording) with Carolyn. How expressing ones opinion and supporting going through this journey as efficiently as possible has been labeled bullying is beyond me. These are public forums..therefore opinions will be shared. Most of us are passionate about how we feel and I mean both camps and probably there are camps in the middle...passion can be translated to bullying? Wow...
I strongly suggest that anyone who thinks it is "rude" and "mean" to tell people that the plan works as written and any deviations "because you just HAVE to!!" will be counterproductive read this thread:.
This person lost 124 pounds in less than a year and makes it quite clear that it was choosing not to give in that made the difference..
Oh, and btw, I find it kind of funny that some of the most clique-ish and rude comments come from those commenting on how "they" aren't here to save their life, so they can do as they please and complaining about how rude it is to point out that the plan works!.
Yes, they absolutely can. But as I've seen others say... you don't get an award for being the "skinniest" fat person here...
I have to say that while people do not have to agree with one person's position, it's how they word it that means a lot. We lose a lot via the written word - we can't see body language, voice inflections and the like. For example, as to the thread on having one alcoholic drink on a first date that I saw this morning, I felt that there were some good posts, some great posts and yes, some snarky posts. I don't know if the people who wrote them meant them to be that way, but it's the way.
Read them. Weight loss brings out some strong emotions, we all have baggage attached to those pounds we are losing, but we all need to read what we write once or twice before hitting the reply button, just to make sure that they are charitable...
I just get tired of the same people responding to EVERYTHING...
I'm sure they're only trying to help - like I said, they feel so committed to this program that it really bothers them to see others not following it 100%. I think they worry for those people. They've seen health problems disappear, they've seen such an improvement that they just want so badly for others to get "better" and they don't want them to fail, and their enthusiasm takes over and they don't realize how they are coming across. It's fear, really...
Frankly, I think we all could use some good faith, and extending the benefit of the doubt to our fellow posters. Yes, we all have different issues and experiences, and IMO you'll get the most out of the boards if you read and react with an open mind. I, personally, am not someone who responds to "tough love" and I've seen comments that I probably would have obsessed over and been hurt by if they were directed at menot because the TL crowd is "mean" but because of how I am psychologically wired. (I've had a lot of therapy, so I'm pretty good at knowing WHAT my healthy dialogue and mindsets should be, even if I can't always do it.) However, I've definitely learned a lot from self-described TL posters, and some of the contentious threads have led to me doing some private introspection in the way that works for me..
Of course, I always believe "think twice, post once" is a good rule for any place on the internet. Being defensive or argumentative is especially likely to invite rancor when we don't have the advanatage of body language and inflection to guide us...
I agree with just about everything here and feel as though it's been needed for quite some time. Sometimes I fear posting a question or a comment because of backlash of sorts and I think in the end, it's counterproductive (at least to me). In all honesty though, I sometimes have to catch myself from doing it in real life (especially with my fiance.. Love to dish out some TL to him sometimes :-/ ) but what works best for ME is encouragement and support..
To sum up, I just want everyone to get along and support each other, as hokey as that may seem...
And some of us have other life experiences. As an RN who works in a small rural hospital, I've seen people "just this once" themselves literally to death..
Patients in their 50s who have no quality of life due to either their alcohol or food intake (or both)... in fact, have had some in their 20s who have damaged their bodies to the point that there is very little hope for any type of recovery... and I've heard every excuse under the sun for why someone "had to" or "couldn't"..
And you can't tell just by how much weight someone has to lose what their actual health status is. It is quite possible that some of those "I'm just here to look better" people may actually NEED this more than those of us who recognize that 50-100 lbs of excess weight is simply unhealthy. I've known plenty of people who managed (usually by virtue of youth or forsaking nutritious foods in order to "indulge" in alcohol or sludge) to keep their weight somewhat under control but whose blood chemistries revealed a dangerously unhealthy person.... whereas many with the excess weight, aside from musculoskeletal issues, were pretty much okay in that direction. (I'm one of those... cardiologists fall in love with my lipid profiles and blood chemistries.
I'm losing the weight now because I know better than to count on it staying that way and I want to like what I see in the mirror!).
So, we can coddle someone and tell them what they want to hear... or we can risk being labeled "rude". Honestly, how someone "takes" what I write reveals far more about their own state of mind than it does mine. Trust me, my ER patients don't always want to hear it, either.... but it doesn't do any good to sugarcoat the truth...
Kamkelms I wish there was a "like" button like on Facebook.
I like what you have to say..
I think most of the folks here can relate to each other whether you're here to save your life or you're just tired of being the "fat girl" in the office.(yeah ...that's me).
I honestly believe that most folks dropping their $.02 mean well.. I know I do.
We just have to remember that behind every screen name is a living breathing person who has probably already had the crap kicked out of them...
Now it bothers you if people happen to be super active on the boards? Didn't know that was a requirement...
Oftentimes, the comments don't seem to be compassionate. We don't need to enable each other, but a little kindness can go a long way. I welcome the input from those who have succeeded on this plan, but if I should happen to ask a question which seems silly or stupid to some, I hope the responders remember that they were in my shoes at one time...
Did you ever stop to think they reason "the same people" respond to everything is they have been around for a long time, they lost the weight, transitioned, are maintaining and stay to help the newbies and/or re-committers. They stay every day even years later. You really think it is just to be snarky?.
If someone would rather not have a veteran answer the question or give an opinion then they should put that right out there..
Start Every thread with "only answer if you plan to agree with me, if you are going to tell me what I don't want to hear then save your breath"...
I realize that the most powerful point of being an American is freedom of speech. I just think we should use our words constructively because we were given the ability to speak to use it as a tool for learning..
Just try to be nice and support on criticize that was my point to the post. And yes agreed words do get misconstrued... Mine as well..
Have a great week op'ers and cheaters, like me. I will support positively ANYONE that is looking for it wether you will only be here today or for years to come as I plan on being here...
Rhonda, there's a world of difference though, between simply not knowing something (I saw one girl who thought she was supposed to eat fruit and while she was questioned about it, nobody said she was stupid... just gave her links to the right information).... and wanting to be validated in something that is clearly not a part of the plan...
Lynne..lol..I am SO looking for the "LIKE" button right now...
In my less kind moments, I was thinking it must drive some of the vets crazy to see the same questions over and over again, and even this same argument over and over againit's already starting to get a reflexive twitch from me, and I'm here a lot less! I have a lot of respect for people who've maintained and still chosen to post here and offer advice, even if I don't necessarily agree with every post..
(But I come from an internet "culture" so to speak, where the etiquette is to lurk a lot before posting, and run a search before you post a question, which I understand is not the expectation of this board. It's just my conditioned response.)..
Ella- I too think given advice from all aspects is great as long as it's not coming from a "you need to do this". Place. I love getting different perspectives from others o I can make the best choice for myself, but there is a way to come across as a helpful person rather then a bossy Betty....
You know what I mean. I try to remember that everyone deals with things differently. It's not coddling it's being considerate of others feelings, fragile as they may seem...
I did not read her post like that..basically she was complaining that some people respond to every post (which I don't agree with, but even so..) and that bothered her. I do not understand that statement...
I agree. I had posted something about a Tb of peanut butter and this one particular poster tried to check me about the use of peanut butter. She was on Medifast when pb wasn't allowed and I had to check myself bc I felt like I did something wrong. I think people try to be holier than thou, some are informational and .others who are passionate. Weight is a touchy subject for A LOT OF PEOPLE. I want to inform those who don't know but I'm NOWHERE near a veteran.
However, if you ask for an opinion, don't get mad if you don't like their responses either. If you can dish it, you gotta take it...
Ashely, I would never say that noone has EVER made a rude comment, but, without prejudice really read some of the responses that the "bullies" give, and I mean really read them. They may be exact and to the point without alot of mush thrown in but they are so dead on........
I wasn't inquiring to all posters with advice. I was suggesting that people not be rude. I agree with you that there are slot of people with great knowledge that do offer constructive advice but there are some that can be kind of nasty with there comments saying that people can't lose weight if they cheat and things like that. We all know that's not true for everyone. It's what people themselves are okay with, you know?..
How could someone reject another when they don't really know the person personally? Maybe, it's just that the someone didn't like what was said. Our children sometimes say they don't like us because of the "No's" we as responsible parents have to say, but hopefully we come to understand why our parents didn't let us do something back then..
I don't equate "objective" to something other than the facts of the matter without involving emotion, (its not "cruel" to be objective), and sometimes "real answers" are "criticism" of the issue. Its one thing to be critical of the issue and another to be critical of the person. I do think most everyone tries to be critical of the issue and not the person...
No, I didn't mean I read Time Traveller's post like that; I was just thinking that my reaction is the reverse, which is kind of a capsule of this whole issue..
(There is, of course, a certain amount of selection biasobviously people who stick around the boards more than a year after maintenance are going to represent the people who are most passionate about the program.)..
Sometimes I see a post that is asking something that is really so fundamental to the program basics that I do wonder if they even do any reading before they choose Medifast as the way to go. That can be frustrating, but that poster also doesn't know that the question was asked and answered 100 times in the last week. It does take a moment to get a handle on how the boards work. I'm quite sure I drove people in chat nuts with my questions when I was new. They say I didn't, but I think they are liars...
I don't know that I've seen very many bullies here. I do see some folks that give very direct answers because it's painful to see someone post in one place about how they are desperate, hate their self image and need to make a change and then in another place write how they just made chocolate chip cookies for the kids and just HAD to have a couple, followed a few days later with being so discouraged because the only lost 1/2 pound and they have been on plan... mostly..
This isn't pee wee soccer. Unfortunately we all don't get a trophy. You work hard, you spend a lot of money on Medifast, you follow the program and you get results. Trying to work the program around your lifestyle instead of re-working your life to change your approach to food is a sure fire approach to failure. Some people, myself especially, need a kick in the rear to get back on track, re-motivate, finish and be successful..
I apologize if I can't sympathize with you because you won't follow the program and you aren't successful. Maybe it's a guy thing, but this is about winning and conquering a lifetime of bad habits. I don't need a ribbon...
LBDann..awesome post. I laughed 3 times. LOVE the "this isn't pee wee soccer" line..
You may not need a ribbon, but you just got a virtual one from me...
Objective probably wasn't the right word to use. I was typing and getting out of thought I think. Trying to use my iPad without a keyboard..
My point was not to not share advice and opinions but to try to say it kindly. Be constructive not critical. Point spoken I'm off my soap box and am looking forward to more comments it's funny how aggressive people get even in asking for kindness. Opinion is totally taken different when expressed with compassion. Just something to think about...
One person's criticism is another person's good advice. It's all in the perception. Something else to think about...
To be honest...I dont give a damn what anyone thinks of me if I "choose" to go off plan for a week I WILL.
We are all in the same boat...TO LOSE WEIGHT AND BETTER OUR LIVES!!!.
So, whats the big PROBLEM here? Sheesh!!.
I say if you wanna drink alcohol while on the 5&1 go ahead and do so...if somebody want to stay 100% OP than I say and do so....Imay not be the best "inspiration" for people out here to follow in my footsteps as I had it rough through out this weightloss journey I'm on..but come on...I lost 99 pounds so far and (that was with 3 months of cheating and going through life problems) but I'm still here 100% OP and still rocking it!!.
I love these boards and glad they have them because I learned a LOT on them....just IGNORE the negative or just by pass it..its just an "opinion" no biggie.....
But I AGREE that reaching your goal 100% is of course the best approach to that...and well thats what I'm doing..staying OP even when I'm sitting here at work right now and there is cheese nachos and tacos I could be stuffing my face with right now...and I'm craving it believe me LOL...its just a mental thing...and well that same JUNk food will be there when I'm at GOAL!!.
Cant we all just get along?? LOL..
Oh and if I wanna WRITE BIG I will hahahahahahaha........
Agree with you Steph. I think if someone wants to go off plan you don't need to ask permission from a support board, just do it and hopefully you will think of the money you are spending, consequences etc. and lose the weight however you can. Simple little questions that are asked here are discussed to death and then some. If you are not strong emotionally I think that some of the negative responses can make you go and eat a whole bag of whatever it is you were craving..
Steph you are doing awesome, you go girl!..
Hahaha....so what do we have to do when we want to "cheat" ask permission from the BOARDS now?? LMAO!! Thats a funny one....hahaha.
Believe...im having cravings so BAD right now that I would love to eat some them nachos that are out there in the breakroom right now...but I'm thinking if they werent there than I wouldnt want to EAT them LOL....gosh it's hard but being FAT is even harder!!!.
Thanks...I have my struggles but we all do.....
Well put. I was blown away at some of the responses in that alcohol thread. Honestly, we all understand what is OP and what is not, and while there are certainly people that stay 100% OP, I'd venture that the overwhelming majority of us have the occasional departure from plan, planned or otherwise. Frankly, with that being the case, I think that we ought not treat as a pariah someone that decides in advance that they are going to give themselves a little bit of leash and searches out the best way to do that without going bananas, while in another thread we send words of encouragement to someone that just loses control and eats an entire sheet cake or something..
If the original poster from the alcohol thread is reading this, know this: I've been doing this diet for almost 3 months now with success, and from time to time, I'll have a glass of wine because it tastes frickin' fantastic. I don't do it very often and I don't drink to excess, but I have had a glass here and there. Moreover, when I do, I do it with a crystal clear conscience, because I'm an adult and while I understand that it's likely going to slow my weight loss, I also recognize that I'm making that choice. While for some people, speed of weight loss is the only thing that matters, I'm content to steadily lose weight while preserving my sanity..
Live and let live, I say.....
So really- You want to know what is the best alcohol to drink with the least carbs- GOOGLE IT, don't ask a bunch of people who are paying $300 a month to lose weight where alcohol is not allowed. Just like steph said- you want to cheat- go a head you are a big girl (no pun intended) just don't ask if it will hurt your plan. everyone is different- some people cheat and still lose some SMELL cookies and don't lose, it's your battle, you are really the only one who can answer how it affects you. I really don't think people here are mean- yes some are more passionate than others but mean?..
I think for me, the thing that rubbed me the wrong way was everyone crawling into this poor woman's head and trying to assess WHY she was going to have a drink and whether that meant that this budding relationship was already doomed to failure because she couldn't NOT have a drink. Maybe she just wanted to have a drink. Ultimately, though, she'd already made the decision to do so, which rendered all of the judgment completely unnecessary..
So are those people "mean?" That's really just a matter of semantics. Ultimately, though, while a number of people subscribe to the "tough love" approach, not everyone does, and assuming that that is what someone is looking for when they announce an intention to go off plan isn't really helpful, IMO...
I think it is healthy to question our intentions- and most of the time I need someone to point me is a different direction. The things were not said to be the case, but just ask yourself why? Why do I feel I should do this? Could this be the reason? just suggestions, thats all. We have to decide what is right for us. You never know something may happen tonight on the OP's date and a light click- OMG someone mentioned (enter mention statement here) and now I feel like I can eat anything and that is a danger in drinking and it may just get her back on track. Or WOW, this guy is really questioning why I only had one drink- maybe he is a little controlling...
Honestly, I joined the group just for myself (I had trouble staying OP and had gained 6 lbs over my spring break)- so if I thought about going off plan- I would think of them. It is a group of WONDERFUL, PASSIONATE, FUNNY, and DEVOTED people. They keep me motivated to stay OP, thats all- there is really nothing tough about it- just a lot of love..
I don't know about all those negative posters and why they think THEIR way is the ONLY way to lose. There are many ways to approach weight loss and what works for me might not work for you and vice versa..
All I know is the BEST results come from being OP 100 percent, BUT whether or not to stay OP 100 percent is a personal decision. Having said that, when the weight loss doesn't happen as anticipated and you've gone off plan, you can't blame Medifast LOL!.
The other thing I've noted is that a common rationale for being "rude" or as some like to say "honest" LOL is that person W dropped X pounds in Y months. Now I don't understand this at all! I didn't realize we were in a weight loss race! And I didn't realizie there would be a medal in it for me if I lost it the fastest!.
I personally see this form of "directness" as really a way for some people to feel morally superior to others because they are OP 100 percent and you aren't...I read a whole bunch of self congratulatory well THIS is the PLAN and YOU better be ON it because I AM (and that makes me feel better). But that's just a personal observation, having been around these boards for a while, and it might not be accurate so take that for what you think it's worth..
I think this is a journey. I think that if you are new to the program you would be well advised, heck, even NEED to be OP 100 percent. If you are secure in the plan and are making progress and are happy with the results and you slip and need support, you deserve support not criticism. If you have questions about what is and isn't OP you should be able to ask the question without fear of being slammed into next Tuesday by some of our more "vocal" posters. If you want approval for a planned off plan day, then that might be pushing it a bit, because in all seriousness, it's going to be your choice and your consequence and you can't expect people here ON Medifast to support your OFF Medifast plans. And if you are secure in the plan and CHOOSE to have off plan moments, don't complain if you don't lose weight AND maybe don't advertise it on this board, as alot of people need absolutely positive proof that being OP 100 percent is worth it.
Just my 2 cents worth, and just an opinion .....
Keep in mind that we are all here for the same reason.....we are or were over weight. Emotionally we are hard enough on ourselves we don't need it from strangers...
This is about the sweetest thing I've seen on this board. Me too! Having one for my evening snack. Woman after my own heart!.
Have a great weekend. I'm going to make a pit stop on your blog. I need a laugh or two today!.
I have never been offended by anyone's answer. If you ask a question you will get a 100 different opinions, so choose the one that suits you the best and forget about others. I love to be on these boards because they give me instant motivation to stay on the plan...
Don't assume this. New people peruse the boards quite frequently. Imagine someone stumbling across a thread where someone asking if alcohol was ok, met by a bunch of "Yes it is!" comments..
It's up to people on the boards to talk about factual points about the plan, if this differs from your view of what you can/cannot do, then thats fine, but the newest people looking to try this program deserve to know the facts about MF...
Type as big as you want.... LOL... actually, I think the point is if you really want to "cheat"... WHY are you asking permission from the boards???..
Eagle, it's about time you chimed in on the boards. Where've you been??..
Actually, it's a matter of where the person READING the post is coming from. A lot of people find those exact same "why" posts extremely helpful. People are determining "intent" by their own subjective feelings rather than reading the actual words without putting their "spin" on them..
Think of the old "friends don't let friends drive drunk" program. Well, friends don't let friends date drunk either... and for a lot of people one drink is enough to blur their judgment. In a society where dating violence is so prevalent and the signs are so subtle... how is it more of a friend or more compassionate to ignore the possibility of problems and somehow more "mean" to say, "Oh, I see this red flag here, be very careful because of this..."..
100% works,,,no one is arguing with that..
Groups that enforce that are needed,,,but,,,it can be done without rudeness..
Those of us who encourage 100% , but want to temper it with a bit of compassion, are needed also..
I DID 5/1 and 4/2 100% as the plan and Medifast advised..
I reached my goal,,,,,100% was very doable for me,,,,,,,,,,BUT,,,,.
Who the h3ll am I, or anyone else, to judge those who take a slower scenic route?.
I am not in their lives, I do NOT know their struggles,,,,and neither does anyone else..
Where does this rudeness get anyone?? Why should all dicussions be only about 100%? And YES, there are several maintainers on here who chose a slower weight loss by detouring now and then,,,,and I have observed,,,they continue to maintain,,years later,,,,,without the need to continually jump back to 5/1. ummm, so maybe slower is better for some?? It is their money,,,not mine,,,not yours..
I don't try to give advice to someone whom I feel needs a more direct," straight to it" approach, I do, however give honesty in my answers, but I try to throw a bit of compassion and understanding into it..
There is nothing wrong with discussions that aren't 100% on plan,,,,,,how pathetic that some just patrol these boards to find some poor soul whose throat they can jump down if that person isn't 100%Give that 100% advice,,,but find some sort of human kindness when giving it!.
Thanks for reading,.
OMG..this is so rediculous. Since when is expressing an opinion rude. I did not see anyone respond to that poster rudely. Incredulously maybe..rudely..no...
Wow, some people got really "fired up" as my dad used to say. Just goes to show how touchy people can get when they feel targeted..
Which I think was the point of the initial post?.
Some peoples responses to honest questions do make people feel bad rather then supporting them if they want to be OP. We do all have our own "plan" and how we get to the goal is our individual choice. I joined the TL'ers and then very shortly unjoined because, man they are tough! But... that works for them...It wouldn't work for me, so I chose not to go there. I suggest if you don't like what is being said on any board then steer clear..
We are all responsible for our OWN actions, every action has a reaction. In turn every time someone does something off plan will result in their OWN consequences..
I think someone should be able to ask questions (I didn't see the initial alcohol question, so I may be speaking out my ***) That way I don't have to ask and risk feeling stupid for asking it..
Expressing an opinion isnt in and of itself rude, it's how it's done...that's the point. And it might be a chance for some...personal growth?...if those who feel they are being told that they are rude continuously maybe reflect on the nature and tone of their posts? Instead of the endless defensiveness???.
I dunno, just my opinion, that's all..
When a person comes to the boards asking how to con the program most effectively, and we proceed to tell them to eat, say, 5 Pringles because those only have 50 calories, versus Lays potato chips which have 150 calories, how is THAT being 'supportive'? Being supportive, to me, means helping a person work THROUGH his dilemmas, find ways to MAKE the program WORK no matter WHAT. To help him lose the weight AND keep it off, once and for all. If we insist on being con artists, we will remain fat & unhealthy & probably wonder WHY! If we help one another STAY ON TRACK, we all achieve the same goal: good health & a slim figure..
I will never come to a thread & help a person figure out a way to cheat most effectively. I'm not a mean or rude person, either, I'm just truthful..
It all depends on how you look at this journey. It can be another failed 'attempt' at getting a handle on your weight issues, or, it can be the LAST program you ever have to undertake. I'd rather see everyone SUCCEED, wouldn't you?.
Now, if someone starts a thread about how to stay OP through their vacation, or how to stay OP without drawing attention to themselves, they will get a HUGE amount of support & helpful comments. It's when the poster asks how to CON the program that he faces retaliation from people who are VERY serious about this program and their new lifestyle..
It feels downright WRONG to be working SO hard TO stay OP & get this weight off, and to then read all sorts of suggestions about how to get away with cheating & how it doesn't stall your losses, and all that sort of nonsense. If that WERE the case, what would be the point OF staying OP? Some people cheat AND reach goal, but most do NOT. That's the plain truth of the matter, and being around these boards for the past 3 years, I've seen far fewer people reach goal than not. THAT is the sad part & something nobody wants to see..
Just my 2 cents. Happy Friday to all...
Its called self righteousness it's a direct mirror into who they are. imagine having to work with them or live near them. Never be afraid of self righteous people either. Happy people treat people well. Unhappy people cant. When you see rude and self righteous posters it's a red flag they are miserable.
Also the louder they preach the more afraid they are of THEMSELVES failing. The louder they are the less confidence they have in their own control not to fail. Its not about the person they are rude to - - - their preaching is them revealing their fears about themselves...
That goes both ways. And quite honestly, that is all we are ever looking for when we ask questions of someone... reflection and personal growth...
Again... since many people read the exact same posts and come away with new insight and fresh determination.... I don't think it is the post. I think it is a clear reflection of the inner voice of the person reading the post and putting a spin and creating a "tone"..
Take the simple sentence: "I can't believe you did that"..
Now read it to yourself with a horrified tone... sounds judgmental, doesn't it?.
Now read it again with a an excited, wow you made it to goal voice.... sounds totally different, doesn't it?.
Same sentence. The spin is all internal to the person reading it...
This is medifast not a personal admiration board, because you agree with them. You would be just as rude to that person if they didnt agree with you...
And now it's considered unacceptable to be happy with someone else's posts???? Sheesh... someone better write up the new board rules!..
1 Glass wine led to 2 months half-working the program led to a net loss of zero pounds led to $600 wasted. Thankfully I pulled myself out of that one and won't be TOUCHING the stuff with a TEN FOOT GILDED LILLY POLE anymore. Just my real-life experience. Take it or leave it...
It isn't the opinion that is rude, it is the method of delivery. All opinions are valid...
It seems to me people are reading "rude" because they don't like the honesty. The two words are not to be confused...
No, really, not everyone DOES know what is OP and what is not. That's the point. That's the MAIN point..
If everyone coddles people who complain about how strict the program is...or how it's "normal" to tweak it...then folks like me would have NEVER been able to be successful..
I NEEDED to read that I could stay 100% OP. I NEEDED to read that tweaking the plan is a dangerous slide into bad territory. Medifast works for me because it IS so strict and regimented, and there's not wiggle-room to sabotage myself..
And there are MANY of us out here, reading and learning from these posts. Just because many people think it's rude...too blunt...not kind...doesn't mean it's not necessary, even VITAL to many of us..
I gotta admit I shake my head when these threads pop up, complaining that there are "rude" posters who are mean and just won't validate the "just this once", "what's the best way to cheat" mentality. Come on...we're not two year olds. We got into this overweight situations from these very approaches. That's true whether you have 100+ lbs to lose, or 20 lbs..
Thank you "Mean" posters. Seriously. You've taught me how to succeed...corrected my incorrect understandings, and empowered me to be successful..
Warning: I am pissy and want to eat off plan so this blog will sound rude and sure to make some mad! haha partially kidding...:-) I just had to respond to this one! I saw a good blog about this so I had to come check it out. I have to start off by saying that the people who seem to be offended by the truth don't want to listen and just want to do what they want to do. (go off plan a little) I have only seen this one other time. other than that, I have not seen any issues with this community.....see? I am rude huh? Let me tell ya, on my hungry days, I speak my mind. ha! To be honest, I truly care and don't want anyone to fall off the program. I want everyone to experience what I have experienced and that is freedom! A NORMAL size!! so I will take a risk, not really caring to make people like me, but rather say what I believe to be true in hopes of saving that one person from falling off the program!.
EllaHalligan!! All I am gonna say is Brillance!..I 100% agree with everything EllaHalligan.
Had to say. I know how this program works, and I know how it doesn't! I also know what excuses look like because I have them and used them many times after I made goal. When I start to hear how someone goes off plan just a little, or gonna make it work for them, all I see is going off completely...maybe coming back after they have gain back 1/2 or all thier weight back. Sorry, but it is the truth! I believe I had success because I did the program the way it was intended to be done. 100% OP. I also stayed connected with beautiful woman who held me accountable and told me the truth.
I hit goal back in may 2010 staying 100% OP the whole time. why? because I listened to what would happened if I had one meal off plan. now that I am back to lose a few pounds, I have dabbled in off plan foods, have made excuses, and "done it my way" guess what? it don't work!!! just because I am only a few pounds from goal doesn't make it ok...I am choosing to do this program the way it was inteded to be done! 100% OP!!.
To all of you who want to get to goal, stay OP and connected! It truly is the only way! if not, anyone who has made it to goal speak up now. I bet there are not too many if any at all! What I do see a lot of is people who choose to stay the course, stay 100% OP, and have great success with the best program there is! MF!! People, you can eat again when your done! you can live in monderation as long as your careful of your trigger foods. but while you are on this program...truly is all or nothing!.
Again, with all of that "rude" stuff I just said comes a huge heart for every person who struggles with weight to find Victory!! It truly breaks my heart to see people fall and leave MF! I have seen it over and over so I know what it looks likes before they fall. I can start to see the excuses in their blogs. :-( I pull for so many to cross that finish line as I did. I will tell you that this community of wonderful woman I have met here has made all the difference for me and continue to support me. I have never been affended, not once! I take everyone advice to heart and am so grateful that they took the time to help me. Have I come across brutal truth? oh yes, but to be honest it was those post that kept me from going off plan! :-) I think I need some right now! I am DARN hungry! will that little bag of chips kill me? YES!! wink wink..
Default Re: Some people on boards are soooo rude..
Originally Posted by slw600.
Chris, I love you!!.
This is medifast not a personal admiration board, because you agree with them. You would be just as rude to that person if they didnt agree with you..
Originally Posted by jacque122.
Keep in mind that we are all here for the same reason.....we are or were over weight. Emotionally we are hard enough on ourselves we don't need it from strangers..
Jacque! I love you!.
Okay, I'll own the snark on admitting that I am dying laughing at this quick set of interchanges.......
Ummm, re: above? Isn't that going from the point of the OP to a personal beef with a poster that you have openly said you don't like?.
I've only read this far so far (sorry; was at work working all day), but I think this really annoyed me too. I think it's fair to remind someone that the choice that they are thinking about making may slow them down, or may "knock them on their behind" as I think was my choice, but that can be done in ways that are not attacking and not trying to psychoanalyze them. I mean, one of the responses was.
Really? This poor woman comes to the board to ask what other people know about trying to do the least amount of damage to her diet in making a choice of an alcoholic drink, and someone is lecturing her about 'compromising' herself, warning her about abusive men and having to go through divorce and court proceedings? Hello, I think that the person who made this response has some pretty damned big issues of her own to deal with, and here she is dumping all over this stranger who asked an innocent enough question. And mind you, this isn't even a scenario where the poster has asked about the man's reaction or comment, either; we did have that once in a thread elsewhere when a woman asked about what to do about her fiance's concerns that she was losing weight so that she could cheat on him. But THIS woman asked about fitting a single drink into her diet!!.
Yep, it was rude. This woman who made the post may never come back to the boards, and god knows who else got chased off as a result..
Here's a clue to you all who must lecture and demand that people who post on this board can only be those who are, according to your definitions, 100% on plan and who never make a reasoned choice to go off plan, only those who make an unplanned slip: NOBODY DIED AND MADE YOU GOD! You have NO right to judge anyone else for how they use the tools that Medifast makes available for weight loss, whether they choose to do it 100% OP for fast weight loss or whether they choose to do something else for slow weight loss. It isn't your right to stick your nose in there unless you are asked...
Actually, I've never said any such thing about that poster. Please inform me where I "openly" said that..
I just thought it was hugely funny that someone would come on, slam someone for something and then do the exact same thing...
Check your forum rules, yo...you don't have to openly say something to have implied or otherwise inferred it..
Really really out of line, and really doesn't help the overall perception of the those involved with the banner that you sport...
But you are okay with the rudeness that African Queen showered on me. Hmmm...interesting tactics..
Ella..save yourself the aggravation..you get enough of it at work...
Two wrongs don't make a right. Others' bad behaviour is no excuse for one's own behaviour. If someone can't control themselves, it doesn't give license to do the same "in retaliation". There is something to be said for getting a personal grip and not blaming others or deflecting attention from one's actions to another. It really doesn't reflect well on that person, or those of that banner, or on those who leap to the defense of bad behaviour..
Thank you "Mean" posters. Seriously. You've taught me how to succeed...corrected my incorrect understandings, and empowered me to be successful. Thank you..
Not sure how to repost what someone else writes....anyways...oh my gosh I love this who ever you are!! Tee hee.
To Chris: you are one of many (woman) reasons why I made gaol back in may of 2010!! your Blogs grabbed me right out of denial and into the truth! Oh yeh! Where I always want to be. Denial keeps us in bondage!.
We we are open to learn, we heal. ok, that is all! tee hee..
I'm sorry, but your double standard makes no sense. Ella simply pointed out that African Queen slammed me for something and then turned around and did the VERY same thing (tongue in cheek I am quite sure). I have no clue why you bring up forum rules to Ella, but are letting those who don't have a TL banner run rampant with their rudeness. I was advised to stay out of here and stop wasting my breath. It was good advice and now I think I will follow it. This is all a bunch of nonsense...
Actually, "crawling inside someone's head".
Being helpful. A large part of losing weight is figuring out our unhealthy thinking and rationals for why we eat the way we do. Many of us really need help understanding our own thinking. If the original poster doesn't need help in this area, they can feel free to disregard this help. But in the meantime, many others have received useful tools to help us examine our own motivations...
WOW you sound like me! That is what I have been saying all day. This has made me feel angry for the first time about the MEDI FAST experience. I could not agree more with you. Read my Blog ( OK, Enough...). Sounds like we were thinking and saying the exact same thing..
Your awesome and we need more people like you on the boards. Thank you...
Tjmoore9 wrote "I have to start off by saying that the people who seem to be offended by the truth don't want to listen and just want to do what they want to do. (go off plan a little)".
That's a flat out lie and a slanderous and an uneducated post..
Ive never been off plan for one second and I hate the rudeness in the posts, so your theory is dead wrong. Im turning you in for writing it too. You are saying all the people who find the rudeness offensive, not to mention scaring away the people WHO NEED HELP THE VERY MOST terrible, are those who want or need to cheat and are those who are in denial. I will not let that remark go. Its out of line. I believe whole heartedly that medifast will protect us from us from remarks like yours! You say you are proud of being rude, so youre saying you dont care if you cause trouble on here...
I'm a gamer, and in game, we have an "ignore" button. I wish there was one for some of the users on these threads..
I've been here for almost a year, and these "OMG someone hurt my feelings" posts come up on a regular basis...and for the most part, people are just letting off steam, even if they do get heated..
But I gotta say African Queen...your post above is probably the first one that has ever made me wish I could put someone on ignore. You took a part of a post out of context, used the word hate, and said you needed "protection" from a post..
You should probably take a few deep breaths and step away from the computer for a while, before your posts start to sound worse than the posts you proclaim to "hate"..
Thank you sister! You visiting my blog makes me heart happy!..
Oh my gosh Whims..there is an ignore button. It's wonderful. Go to discussion boards, edit Profile/settings and on the left, you will see Buddy list/Ignore list. It had brought peace to my life, but I have a habit of being curious so I go undo it to read a useless post and then regret it...
Sometimes I dream all night about that brownie... and when I'm feeling REALLY naughty I'll eat two in one day!.
Mmmmmm. I heart you medifast brownies. I really do.....
HEY, Brownies are my trigger food! Should we be discussing them?!!! LOL!.
I havent' had one yet but with two shoutouts for them on this thread, I might need one before the morning! Cause clearly alcohol is out of the question!.
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