I'm stumped. I'm not so sure what is the right answer. I'll do some investigation and get back to you if I discover an useful answer. You should email the people at Medifast as they probably could assist you..
She is so wrong. What's gonna happen, she is going to see your success and she is going to think about herself. I love the truth serum like the next person but I don't like my obese body!! I gotta give something up. My coworkers are like that. They seen me do well and now, they're interested. Give her time and if she is still being negative, then don't talk about Medifast with her or you may need to surround urself around more positive friends...
80 pounds overweight? Yep, sounds like she's got it all figured out.......
I hear ya...my friends have watched me lose 120 lbs, my sister lose 120 lbs, my other sister lose 65 lbs and my mom lose 65 lbs...all of us reached our goals. But two of them are having surgery! I just have to support their choice...though I'll NEVER understand it!!! As a coach, I've helped dozens and dozens of people successfully navigate the plan to goal...oh well. Sometimes we don't see the solution when it's right in front of us!.
Keep working hard on YOUR plan, and let her find her way....
Peace & good health!.
I understand your wanting your friend to lose weight with you, but you know everyone starts this journey on their own timing. I have always experienced the fact that if your head isn't in agreement with your stomach - no diet will work. Just like everyone here says not to let the naysayers get you down, I believe we can't "talk" others into joining us either..
Just my $.02...
Her kind of attitude scared me at first, too!.
I've always wanted to find a diet that I could lose weight with and also live with forever. For 7 years, I've searched and remained fat and unhealthy..
I'm losing weight with Medifast and I'm using this time on Medifast to plan how I'm going to eat *forever*, after MF..
Yes, I'll have wine and beer and the occasional long island iced tea. But I'll be having those as treats, not as a night cap! I'll have that luscious desert - on very special occasions and I'm not going to eat as much of it. (I've discovered that I'm just as satisfied with three little bites as I am with a whole slice of cake!).
No, I'm not going to deny myself everything like I am while I'm in the active weight-loss phase, but I'm not going as wild..
So, for now, i'm biting the bullet and doing what I have to do to get this weight off..
She's just not ready to make the sacrifice and that is FINE! She'll get there when she's ready. Accept that she's not at the "nothing tastes as good as being thin feels!" stage..
But the important thing to hold on to is that HER attitude is hers and cannot derail YOUR attitude and progress unless you let it..
Just keep trudging forward and smile and nod, smile and nod.....
Just stay positive and stay OP and before you know it, everyone will be telling you how great you look and asking for your secret - and your friend may come around, or she may remain hostile and 80 pounds overweight, or she may be inspired to seek out a plan that will work for her. You're making the right decision. Stick with it...
The same situation happened to me, but I have a happy ending to tell you about! So here's my 2 cents for what it's worth. My best friend lives in Canada, and I'm here in NY. We always were either losing or gaining weight together, for the most part. I began Medifast last April (2010) and didn't fully tell her, but as I lost weight I would. I planned a trip to see her in October 2010 and it was miserable (I was 35lbs down). All she could talk about was weight.
I was going bonkers! Here I was visiting my BEST FRIEND and we're sitting around 24/7 discussing weight. She would try and cut me down and bash the program, etc. At first, I was hurt. Then I realized she was jealous. Her anger was more a reflection of being upset with herself than with me, for letting herself gain so much weight and here I am having lost it.
So trip ended and we'd talk once and awhile but she would bring up my weight and everything, but I kept brushing it aside. Well this week I confronted her about it, and she admitted she was envious/jealous and was having a really hard time that I had lost all this weight and she let herself go. Seeing me she said, was a real eye opener and it was very difficult for her. She is nothing but supportive and regrets having been a bad friend to me and not more supportive. She has since decided to lose weight (not Medifast but low-carb).
Be that for your friend. You'll do great on Medifast and hopefully you losing weight will give her the motivation to lose it too! Then you can be her cheerleader, mentor, and motivator no matter what diet she chooses. So go on with your bad MF'in self and rock this program! I have a feeling she'll come around sooner or later.
Lisa - You can't force someone to do something they don't want to. I know you love her friend and want to help her. The best thing you can do is be an example to her. Once she sees how well you're doing, she may change her mind..
Focus on YOU and YOUR program. Don't let your friend derail you because she's not supportive...
I'm confused...this is a close friend but you call her fat? Overweight or not that's no way to treat a real friend. Personally I agree with her. I collect wine and enjoy drinking it, and even on Medifast I have a glass every so often (not daily, but on date night or if we have friends over) and I'm still losing weight..
But you can't nag someone into a diet. If she isn't ready she will fail and bring you down. You have to do this for you. If she is a friend (and the toxic talk makes me think you both need to examine what a real friend is) than you should quit asking and she should quit knocking you down..
But frankly....if someone said to me I was on a "stupid" diet....I'd be shopping for a new friend. Ditto for the fat comment...
Based on how hostile she is, sounds like she's a little jealous of your success and angry at herself for not having the motivation to do it. I've been there before!.
I think you may find at some point in the future that she starts asking you more about Medifast. Everyone has to be at the right place in their life to make a big change like committing to Medifast!..
Ding, ding, ding!!!!!!!!.
Highlight! Bold! Make that the front-page head-line!!!!.
We cannot be thin and healthy if we don't give something up!!.
I've spent waaay too much time looking at the diets of "the stars" and models, etc. The facts are:.
- they're naturally thin.
- they don't eat much.
- most of them are nut-jobs!.
The women that are held up as the American "ideal" usually starve themselves. I'm sorry, but eating a yogurt for breakfast, a chicken salad with no cheese or dressing for lunch and having 2 oz of salmon with 1 cup of broccoli and 1/4 cup wild rice sounds like a diet to me. And then these people say things like, "Well, I eat whatever I want.".
BS. So the rest of us think that something's wrong with us when we eat whatever we want or just cut out sweets and are still fat. We see the glorious people eating rich food at a function and don't see that that person hit the gym for 4 hours a day and starved themselves for two weeks in preparation for that special day..
No, these people sacrifice and work for what they have. Period. Most of them have genetic on their side to give 'em a boost, but they can't keep what G-d gave them without work..
For years, I'd look at some model's diet and think, "I don't want to go *that* far!" Well, guess what - that's why I'll never be a model. (That and the fact that I'm a foot too short... and the low forehead... and the crooked nose... and the acne issues... but other than *those* things, I'd be a model).
The fact is, I wasn't ready to make a long-term sacrifice. I wasn't ready to accept that I had to give up something to be cute and fit. Heck, people, we've got to give up a lot to remain that way..
This girl isn't even ready to make the short-term sacrifice and that is OK. It's good that she's not doing this yet! If she plunged into Medifast with the "I can do this for 6 months, then it's over" attitude, then she'd be one of the ones who regained everything after the diet...
I just hit 20 lbs and I still have a ways to go BUT I feel amazing and medifast is amazing. I can already tell who my true friends are and who is feeling alittle "threatened' by my success. you know what TOO BAD for them, for the first time in my life I feel worth it and Im not letting anyones feelings deter me from being healthy. jealousy is ugly but it is there. Just know what your doing is right and let her make her own choices. your "stupid" diet is saving your life..
Best of luck and stay motivated..
I have a friend like that. She would give me a million and one excuses why she couldn't do it. I just finally learned to tune it out..
Here is her excuses:.
Not enough calories..
Back to to expensive..
But in the time I have been doing Medifast here is what she has tried and dropped after 3 days:.
Buying tons of 100 calories packs, and special water..
I just keep eating my little packages of food, and having my lean & green...
Igloochic~ I never called my friend fat. I was referring to ME being fat. I'm the one who is sick and tired of being fat, hence going on MF. Sorry for the understanding...
Just wait....just wait until she gets a look at the new you when you lose the weight!!!!.
I can so relate to what you are going through..
Keep in mind that a friend like this will try to do anything and everything to make you fail. Do this for you and keep the positive mindset you are in right now. We are all your friends here and we support you!.
Awwwww...thanks so much Lyn and everyone else who sent me words of support and encouragement. I am doing this for ME. I've always put everyone else first..my husband, my kids, my friends, etc. This is something I am going to do for me and it means the world to have all of your support. Thanks again so much...
I have a long way to go, to reach my ideal weight, which is actually lower than my current goal. When I started this journey, my friends at work, were concerned and questioning my decision, to say the least..
Well now it is about 6 weeks later and people are starting to cheer me on. It is a lot easier to avoid what I shouldn't have, with the added encouragement! Also the 'friend' that was the biggest boo hisser, that would literally follow me around with chinese food or candy, waving it in my face, constantly truing to get me to eat is now cheering me on..
I complimented her on her style of dress, asking her to take me shopping when I lose weight, so I can look as good as she does. ;-).
Now, she tells other people off if they try to tempt me!! Your friend will be jealous, then proud and hopefully will come to the conclusion that she wants to be healthier!! You will be a great example to her!!..
Lisa....I was like your friend about 5 months ago. I thought to myself I could never give up my beer or wine. I started Medifast at the beginning of 2011 and told myself I could still drink while OP. I did drink for awhile but then started putting that one glass of wine into perspective and realized it wasn't worth it. I know a lot of people won't agree with me here, but maybe tell her to start Medifast and let her drink her precious wine every now and then....she'll see for herself that it's not worth it...
I say screw her and just worry about YOU!..
Lots of good advice here - my biggest worry if she's your best friend is that when you go through challenging moments on this plan she may have enough influence to convince you to give up..
Please come to the boards if you are ever feeling that way to get inspiration. Know this plan works, just stick with it no matter what your friend says! :-)..
This is a key truth and you are smart to realize it. YOU DESERVE to put yourself first and YOU DESERVE SUCCESS on MF..
Remember this. And your friend might come around. If she doesn't, it is her loss. Or should that be NOT her loss LOL..
Anyway, keep your chin up and do not let anyone's comments derail you. Best of luck...
Be a quiet inspiration!.
You will "say" more with your losses than anything else!..
As they say, "you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make them drink". She will come around in time, and seeing your example will make it click for her. Good Luck in your losses...
As everybody else said, when she is ready she will find something that works for her. Don't let her derail you, if yo want motivation come here to get it, there is tons available!!..